I felt like I put my foot in my mouth yesterday at the boy’s soccer game. However, luckily for me the mother realized I didn’t mean any offense by my statement that I stated. She was asking her son loud enough for all to hear, “if he changed his mind about playing sports?” She told him that he needed to stop playing the piano and start considering playing sports. I jumped in and said, “One day he’s going to have a number one music hit, and you’ll be utterly glad he stuck to the piano.” I wasn’t trying to offend her or tell her she was wrong for wanting him to play sports. I did express that to her in detail after I said it.
However, that doesn’t change the fact that to me I came across as judging her for her statement. In all out honesty, I have NO ROOM to judge any mother or tell them how to raise their kids. God knows I’m having a hard enough time trying to figure out what is best for my three let alone someone else’s kid(s).
Why I Ate Foot
It just struck a nerve in me because when I was growing up I WANTED to play sports (or at least be given the chance to LEARN how to play them.) I got to do P.E., but for someone like me that wasn’t near enough time to learn how to actually play a sport to determine if I was any good at it or not. I DID enjoy doing gymnastics in elementary school, and had wanted to continue doing it, but my mom insisted I learn how to ride horses.
She literally invested in four professional trainers to teach me how to ride a horse. I refused to show her I knew what I was doing in hopes that I’d be able to do gymnastics still. I honestly look back and wonder if my mom was more afraid of me getting hurt doing gymnastics than she was of me getting hurt on horses. I literally used my swing set as my gymnastics bars all the time. I can also remember running and doing flips onto my bed every night. I also did handstands and flips in the pool. I did them every chance I got. I never learned how to do the backflip because I wasn’t allowed to stay in gymnastics long enough, but I still watch people do it in amazement. I love watching gymnastics to this day.
Then when I moved to SC, I wanted to become a cheerleader since that was the closest thing to gymnastics for me that I knew of around here. Nope, wasn’t allowed to do it. Instead my mom shoved a new horse down my throat. Most girls I know dream of having a horse and when I did finally get one that I loved it was worth giving up sports, but until that day came, I was jealous of the girls who got to do sports or be a cheerleader.
I don’t shove sports down my kids throat, but if they show an interest in wanting to do it I’m going to do what I can to ensure they get to play. My boys are currently playing soccer and are loving it. They both are doing the best they can. I can’t say that they are the stars of the teams, but I can say that they are giving a solid effort to be a major part of the team and do their part!!
I know I personally feel every parent has their own style and way of handling things because all kids are different. However, I also feel that every parent can give tidbits of information that may make another parent’s life easier if we’d all be open to listening to thoughts/suggestions from other parents. Doesn’t mean we have to take the advice, but if we hear it with an open mind we may actually gain something. I know I have gained a lot through the years by listening that way.
Do you find yourself as a parent eating foot with other parents?
I have been guilty of stuff like that. My sister let her kid watch a movie that I personally dont think is approporiate for kids and i made the statement well my kids arent going to watch That movie. After I said it I felt as if i was judging her and that was not my intent. New follower would love the follow back.
http://blessedchick-trythis.blogspot.com
Glad to have you as a follower. Warning sometimes my post are boring, but then I come up with something decent. 🙂
I look forward to following your blogs as well. 🙂
Great post! I think it’s hard because we sometimes have an experience we want to share, we may want to jump in on something. I tend to be shy with strangers and really loud with non-strangers, so I’m more likely to offend a friend doing this. 🙂 It’s a great lesson about the horse lessons, though, and I’m sure you will be more free with your kids after that!
I don’t think you’re “guilty” of anything. Your comment to that Mom wasn’t a big deal, and I think you shouldn’t feel bad. Seriously, I think instead of worrying about being “judgemental” I think other Mothers should stop feeling so judged. You weren’t judging her, you were just expressing your thoughts, an observation, chatter, whatever you want to call it. Can we not do that anymore? Is that not allowed? How boring if we never expressed our opinions for fear of offending someone. Because that’s what it has come down to, and I’m so sick of it!
(Found you from the BlogHer fb post, btw) Hi!
Thank you for the comment. 🙂 I enjoyed your blog as well. 🙂