Zeva wants to be held or given attention ALL the time, and I obviously can’t do that. We are trying to get her use to being independent more and more, and it’s becoming a LONG hard road for us. She literally pretty much cried all day long because I wasn’t holding her in my arms or giving her my undivided attention. I hate to see her cry so much, but in the same token, I can’t cave into her requests all the time either, even if she is only 7 months old. I know it sounds rough to do that to a seven month old, but there is only one of me, and I do have other things to do besides hold her all the time.
I do have the carrier, which I do put her in from time to time, but I also do believe that she needs to gain independence from me as well. How else is she going to physically grow if I don’t make her play independently?? I feel every child needs to do that. However, she is driving me UP the wall, ACROSS the ceiling, and back ACROSS the floor, and UNDER the carpet. I am going CRAZY!! I know I can’t cave. I love her with every ounce of my being. I have to repeat that to myself to get through the screaming fits she is giving me.
I have seen first hand what happens to kids who are entertained by someone all the time or having someone “help” them do everything that they need to do. I struggle with one of my kids trying to get him to learn and do things on his own. He has NO common sense because he was never given the chance to learn those life skills when he was younger because he had someone step in and “help” him do EVERYTHING. He is almost 9 years old, and lacks the capabilities of doing things that he should be able to do 110% on his own. It makes me so mad and sad all at the same time. He struggles in almost everything he does in life because he lacks confidence in himself and abilities to do things on HIS OWN!!
My first born was so independent by the time she was 2 years old. She was able to dress herself and do many other things as well. Of course, I was a single mother, and she had to learn how to do these things early in order for us to be able to get where we needed to go and have time to be together doing fun things like going to the park, to the movies, and watching movies at the house.
I can’t stress how much of a difference it makes in kids lives when they are given the chance to learn life skills early in life. It gives them so much more out of life than if someone does it for them. It’s a struggle and lots of tempertatiums take place, but it’s so worth it when the child sees what they can accomplish on their own. As time goes on, they will seek out taking on more challenges in their lives.
To this day, I love a good challenge, and will do what I can to conquer it. I learn so much each day.
I’m definitely not a perfect parent by any stretch of the imagination, but with each child I learn something new. 🙂
